Invisible

I know my earlier blog made no sense to anyone but me, but I've been thinking about it all day. I've been thinking about how it feels to have someone know you, but not see who you really are, to have someone look right through you. It's funny (in an ironic way) how God brings things to my attention. It seems He speaks to me through my hurt, my pain or my offense the most. That is when He teaches me best. It's when he shows me the other side of the coin. He takes my experience, my knowledge of a particular thing to show me truth. I remember several years ago when I was going through a particularly hard time in my marriage. I remember driving home from work, sobbing. I was feeling pretty low about myself as a wife, and in general. I told God that I wished I were different, that He had made me different, that He hadn't placed certain desires in my heart, that He had given me a different personality. I was questioning how my husband felt about me, because he didn't spend any time with me and when he did, we fought. I heard God speak clear as day in my heart. He told me He made me to please Himself. Not that I had to please Him, but that He was pleased with how He had made me. He asked me how it felt when my husband didn't have time for me. I realized then that was how I made God feel when I took my relationship with Him for granted. It broke my heart to realize that I could grieve Him in such a way. That I could make Him feel like He wasn't worth of my time.

Anyway, that was just an example. But my point is I was thinking about feeling invisible today and God turned it around on me. How often do I interact with someone and just look right through them. Do I take the time to take a deeper look? To really get to know someone? To make them feel valued, respected, loved? This happens with all of us all the time, even with those we love the most. We are busy people. So when a friend or family member comes to us to talk, do we half listen, thinking about the rest of our to-do list in our head, not really paying attention? Do we take the time to ask questions, to delve deeper, to understand what they are really saying? Do we share the pain or hurt of those we love, or are we too busy to notice? I know there are many times, I just don't want to mess with it. I want to do the minimal to show I care and move on to the next task. There are so many opportunities in each day to stop and encourage someone. Do we take the time to look beyond the surface, beyond the polite chit-chat, the half-hearted smile? There are so many people, so many of us, that are crying inside and yet we hide it, hoping that someone will take the time to really look at us. To care enough to dig a little and share our struggles. And not just to share the struggles but to recognize and affirm the good things in us. I really don't want to treat anyone like they are invisible. I've always purposed to treat others with respect. I choose to believe the best about others. Some might call that naive, in fact some have. But I would rather be naive than cynical. I want to be someone who encourages others. I think there have been many times when the heart of someone I care about has been invisible to me. But whose fault is that? I have the responsibility to dig deeper, to show I care enough that eventually I can be trusted. I don't want to look over or look past or look through another person. Because all it takes is one person to make a difference. I know, because there have been many times when one person cared enough about me to ask questions, to dig deep inside to the hidden things. And it mattered. That kind of grace is beautiful and healing. Suddenly you are no longer alone and that makes all the difference.