I Stand By the Door

I Stand By the DoorSamuel Shoemaker

I stand by the door
I neither go too far in nor stay too far out
The door is the most important door in the world.
It is the door through which men walk when the find God.
There's no use in my going way inside and staying there
When so many are still outside and they, as much as I, crave to know where the door is
And all that so many ever find is only the wall where a door ought to be.
They creep along the wall like blind men with outstretched, groping hands
Feeling for a door, knowing there must be a door, yet they never find it.
So I stand by the door.

The most tremendous thing in the world is for men to find that door-
The door to God.
The most important thing any man can do
Is to take hold of one of those blind, groping hands and put it on the latch-
The latch that only clicks and opens to the man's own touch.
Men die outside that door
As starving beggars die on cold nights in cruel cities in the dead of winter
Die for want of what is within their grasp
They live on the other side of it, live because they have found it
Nothing else matters compared to helping them find it
And open it and walk in and find Him.
So I stand by the door.

Go in great saints, go all the way in
Go way down in the cavernous cellars and way into the spacious attics
It is a vast roomy house, this house where God is.
Go into the deepest of hidden casements of withdrawal, of silence, of sainthood
some must inhabit those inner rooms,
And know the depths and heights of God
And call outside to the rest of us how wonderful it is
Sometimes I take a deeper look in, sometimes venture in a little farther
But my place seems close to the opening
So I stand by the door...

I admire the people who go way in,
But I wish they would not forget how it was before they got in
Then they would be able to help the people who have not yet even found the door
Or the people who want to run away from God again
You can go in too deely and stay in too long and forget the people outside the door
As for me, I shall take my old accustomed place
Near enough to God to hear Him and know He is there
But not far from men as to not hear them and remember that they are there too.
Where? Outside the door.
Thousands of them, millions of them
But more important for me, one of them, two of them, ten of them
Whose hands I am intended to put on the latch
So I shall stand by the door and wait for those who seek it.
I had rather be a doorkeeper, so I stand by the door.

Why?

There are a couple of why questions in life that everyone runs into sooner or later. One of these questions is, why am I here? I'm not even going to attempt to answer that one. I think the answer to that question is unique to each individual and since I still haven't figured out the answer for myself, I'm just going to leave it alone. Besides, not having the answer frustrates me. The other question most of us ask is why do bad things happen. Or more accurately, why does God allow bad things to happen? Whether we challenge the idea of God, doubt God or just wing it on blind faith, we all want to know why God doesn't keep bad things from happening. I ask this question myself. And even though I partially understand, the answer I have just brings up more questions, so I'm not going to share it with you. But believe me, I still wonder.

Why does a wife and mother die within months of her diagnosis of cancer, even though everyone she knows is praying for her healing?

Why are young innocent children terrorized and vicitmized everyday?

Why does my good friend struggle with Multiple Sclerosis. The last time I called her she wasn't even able to talk to me on the phone. One of her friends there had to try to relay what she thought my friend was saying. I cried.

Why do natural disasters occur and wipe out large portions of a population?

Why are there people who are neglected, ignored and feeling unloved, living all around us?

Why are there millions living in poverty and disease, unable to get basic economic help and medical care?

Why,why, why? These questions go on and on. I'm sure if we kept track, we could fill books full of questions.

But...here is what I do know.

Simply put, I trust God. I don't always understand why things happen the way the do or why the happen, but regardless, I believe that God is faithful. I believe that God loves us. So when I can't answer the question why, I believe God is working for good on my behalf.

Also, I believe God loves us. I believe it is His will to give us the best, to mold us into the best people we can be. Because He loves us, I believe that He is right there beside us grieving along with us at all the heartache, the pain, the chaos, the evil in the world. Why doesn't He fix it? Immediately? I don't know, but I know, that it grieves Him even more than it does us. I don't know, but I know, that it grieves Him even more than it does us. Because God is love, His capacity for love is beyond what we can measure, so his capacity to be hurt, to be wounded, to mourn is also beyond our capacity to do the same.

Here's another thing I know. Grace balances out sin. "Where sin abounds grace abounds much more." So for every time we ask why bad things happen, God goodness is at work. How do I know this? I know that there are many people I've prayed for or seen prayed for who were not healed the way they expected or who died. But I know my husband was healed of cancer. I know there are children who are abused and neglected, but I've personally experienced and even see other children who are raised in homes/environments where they are showered with love and praise. I know that natural disasters occur and that people live in poverty and disease, but I also have seen these things motivate others to give of their time, energy and resources in reaching out to make things better for those who have less. There is never as much good done or time, love and caring given as after a tragedy occurs or is discovered. And I know that even though the wife and mother I knew died, she finally came to know Jesus, something her family had been praying for her for many years. That in itself was a miracle in the midst of a heartbreak.

So when I want to ask why, I remember these things. Even though evil, pain and suffering are at work, God's mercy, love and goodness are also at work.